Thursday, May 29, 2014

Disclaimers and Confidence

A few weeks ago, Bailie published a post titled Disclaimer Free Blogging that really resonated with me.  She wrote, "I kept thinking that my points were valid and I should not hide behind little words in italics at all. I do not do that in real life so if I have a blog to share my view of life with the world why should I shy away from posting the things that are on my mind... Confidence can be hard to come by in this age of having such a close and unique look into so many various lives but we need to remember that we all have something to offer."

I've noticed this more and more around the internet in the last few months - explanations, apologies, and justifications at the top of meaningful blog posts.  There's been a huge push in the last year or so towards an acceptance of "authentic" blogging, which is great, but it seems like a number of bloggers aren't actually comfortable being imperfect on their blogs and so they shield their vulnerability behind defensiveness.  It makes me sad to read a post that begins with a near renunciation of the content that follows because it makes me feel like the blogger either doesn't trust me or, worse, she doesn't trust herself.

Blogging should build confidence.  It's an opportunity for us to develop our voices and to discover communities of like-minded friends; we should be able to publish what we want how we want.  I don't think it should ever be necessary to post disclaimers on our own blogs, no matter how personal or controversial the topics we write about might be.  That doesn't at all mean that we should feel obliged to post personal or controversial thoughts - I like Bethany's take on perceived perfection online, where she reminds bloggers of the appeal of the pretty and polite - but, if we feel compelled to by something inside ourselves, we should do so with confidence.  I'm sure I have written my own disclaimers over the past four years but, going forward, I'm going to follow this flowchart if I'm tempted to add a one to a post:



If I wanted to be funny, this would be the perfect place to add a disclaimer - something along the lines of "this works for me but it might not work for everyone and that's okay" - but I really do want to know: what do you use to guide what you post and how when you blog about intimate or tricky subjects?

 photo 866de425-8336-4c63-9efd-1c4dd8bf0e62_zpsafe0d56b.jpg

16 comments:

  1. I really loved reading this. And I think this flow chart is absolutely excellent. I have personal posts that have been sitting in my drafts for ages. Maybe I'll never publish them. Maybe I don't need to because just sitting down and writing out my thoughts was good enough. x

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  2. Wow, this is so true. Even just for little things like I will often write 'sorry for the photo quality - I only had my iPhone' or something similar, but who cares!? I shouldn't and my readers shouldn't. As for disclaimers - I get there is a fear in this world over law suits etc, but I 100% agree with you. We should be able to be free to blog about whatever we want!

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  3. Yup. I mean, I get the "I am not a doctor, so speak with a professional if you're concerned" sorts of disclaimers, but it. An be taken too far.

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  4. I really think that the WRITING can be more cathartic than the publishing! It's hard because we all WANT to share but sometimes it's nice when we work things out for ourselves and then keep them somewhat intimate, you know? definitely something I struggle with too.

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  5. I think sometimes I add "this works for me, but might not for you" disclaimers because I get annoyed with faux-expert bloggers who often claim ultimate truth. So my disclaimer is an attempt to separate myself from that trend.


    But I do agree with your points here. If we aren't willing to trust our community and/or aren't ready to face the potential consequences of a post, then maybe keep it for ourselves and don't hit publish. I've tried to keep this in mind with my photography this year. If I feel like I need to apologize for the quality of the photo, then it shouldn't be on my blog to begin with.

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  6. The more comfortable I've gotten with blogging, the more I can't stand apologies and disclaimers. Be confident and own your opinion, your thoughts, your photos, and your passions!

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  7. So excited to read your post on disclaimers and blogging. The flowchart is great and points out a great point that some posts disclaimer or not perhaps are just not for publishing. I often talk over things with Fredrik before posting something that might make people prickly, in addition to that if I keep bringing up a certain topic or subject I figure that more people beyond Fredrik should hear about it.

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  8. Did you make that flow chart yourself? It's brilliant! Love it, Betsy. One thing that actually has bugged me lately is disclaimers about photographs. Not entirely the same thing as an entire post but same topic. I've seen more and more "Sorry for the blur. I took this with an iphone" disclaimers, and I think it's unnecessary. Why do we need to apologize for the pictures we share? If you really think it's that bad, don't show it. And if you are going to show it, just post it and be proud. But don't cheapen a cute but blurry photo of you and your husband or your mom or your kid by adding an asterisk to it. But going back to your point about disclaimers for posts, I used to do with way more. I hardly ever do it now (although, coincidentally, I did kind of add one to today's post accidentally). I like asterisks more when they're just for the funny.

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  9. Sometimes I have Jordan read a post over before I publish it just to make sure what I want to say is coming across. We should write well enough that our meaning is clear without the need for a disclaimer. Great Bailie! Good thoughts for us all :)

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  10. Thanks! I also have Fredrik proof read sometimes for continuity of an idea and grammar!

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  11. I love that the far left column leads to "Don't hit publish." I feel like a lot of disclaimer posts I've read hide behind a disclaimer so they don't do that honest evaluation of the writing or the content in the post. I've gone back and looked at things I thought were good responses to an issue I found pertinent at the time and deleted them because I wasn't really adding any fresh perspective and hadn't worked through my conclusions, at least not well enough to hit "publish."

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  12. I almost don't for the 'the internet is such a public place' reason. Does it make a difference in my writing? I'm sure it does, but there is a balance I think.
    I do totally agree with you & Bailie, you shouldn't be forced to disclaimer though, after all it is your corner of the internet. Except when stuff is complimentary in a review!

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  13. ah, you "almost don't" what!?


    but YES sometimes disclaimers are legally necessary, like when you're reviewing a product or writing a sponsored post. I should make made a disclaimer to specify! haha

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  14. I know that the "honest evaluation of the writing" is a big part of this flowchart for me, especially when I write about touchy subjects. If I'm tempted to include a disclaimer, it means I need to EDIT EDIT EDIT!

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  15. I'm sorry but I love that flowchart. (AND disclaimer.)

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  16. The posts that I've gotten the most traffic from are often the ones where I say something that I feel might anger someone. And I often do say something like, "This might not work for everyone..." but I never really thought of that as a disclaimer, though I suppose it is. I just don't want to come off as being really harsh about something that I think when someone else may not think the same.

    I have a lot of posts like this that are in draft in my head. Things that I would love to share but don't necessarily feel like putting out there in the void. I like to post opinion pieces because most often my readers have opinions on the topic, too, but I feel more hesitant with personal pieces. I waffle between wanting to share and wanting to keep something for myself. But I don't think I'd put disclaimers on those anyway.

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