Wednesday, January 2, 2013

Wedding Wednesday: Exit the Bride and Groom

Boy, am I glad that Wedding Wednesday is back!  (Jon asked me to say "jeepers," because last weekend we watched an episode of Foyle's War where the GIs come to Hastings and we've been speaking like we're stuck in the US circa WWII ever since, but that was a bit too much for me.)  Sorry, focus - Wedding Wednesday, hello again!

I'm actually going to start off with a horrible confession.  It's horrible for this sort of post, anyway: I'm really distressed by a lot of popular wedding trends.  Not all of them, of course, as we'll certainly be incorporating some of the ideas you see all over wedding blogs into our own celebration, but a lot of them.  I just suspect that many of the "unique" and "quirky" touches that so many brides and grooms have at their weddings do not, in fact, have anything to do with the style they have developed as a couple.*

Therefore, Jon and I resolved from day one to only bring pieces into our wedding that relate to us and to our history; things that we'd use in any other situation, celebratory or otherwise.  Obviously that doesn't mean that I don't drool over oversized helium balloons with mustaches painted on and tied with hemp rope .  (Whatever. You know what I mean.)  I do.  But I'm so uncomfortable with the idea of featuring something at our wedding just because it's trendy that, if I do like an element that happens to be the thing to have at the moment, I examine my reasons for wanting it at every angle to make sure that it truly fits us.


That's why I've been resisting a big and showy exit from the reception.  I love sparklers, but the idea of us running through a gauntlet of our fire-wielding guests as we flee the party at the end of the night seems very... made-for-the-photo.  Besides, I thought, we'll be spending our first night as man and wife at the Hall at Bruisyard, 500 feet away from the barn where the ceremony and reception will be held.  Jon and I don't need to make a scene when we get away.  We could just slip out and scamper off to the bridal suite without telling anyone!

But then we celebrated New Year's Eve in a country where fireworks are almost entirely legal.  At this same party last year, some of the boys went to the end of the garden and set off a huge display and we all ran around like fairies on uppers, waving sparklers around in the darkness in a glorious tizzy.  It was gross and rainy outside this year so we weren't able to do any of that and I was totally despondent about it.  Because I can't make it through five minutes without thinking of our wedding, I decided in a champagne haze that sparklers really are magical and we simply must be cheered out of the reception through an aisle of glittering light.  Doesn't it look fun?

[ clockwise from top left: 1 / 2 / 3 / 4 ]

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*I would never hate on a wedding for being SMP-worthy, obviously.  If some (or all, I suppose) of the hot trends work for you as a couple, then I look forward to seeing how they celebrate your love.  It's just not for us!

linking up with something charming today

25 comments:

  1. I doubt we're having an extravagant exit even though the sparklers look amazing! Not worth it considering how many of my family members (....9 I think is the current count!) are staying in Alex's parents house and are leaving so soon after the wedding. So many friends and family members to deal with, I'd rather spend our time with them instead of making a big exit and then being all "oh heyy" the next morning!

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  2. I have a special place in my heart for sparklers. They are kind of magical, aren't they? When we were planning our wedding I didn't want a grand exit. Similar to you two, we were staying nearby + none of the traditional exits seemed very 'us'. A few days before the reception we decided to go ahead and do the birdseed thing for a variety of reasons and I'm actually SO glad that we did, for a few reasons! 1 - the pictures are adorable 2 - we laughed so hard at the hotel while we were shaking birdseed out of our hair, shoes, my bra, everywhere! 3 - there is something really cool about ending the reception by seeing everyone you love squished together in one place, trying to see around everyone else to see you. It's a great moment! My advice is to go slowly - the whole day goes by so quickly, don't rush out. Stop and look around, grab a kiss...enjoy it! xoxo, eliza

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  3. haha yes it does get trickier when so many people are staying WITH you on the wedding night! I do like though that it gets everyone together for the goodbye - you don't have to say goodnight to 100+ people individually! like what we were talking about on your post the other day :)

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  4. oh GOOD! we were thinking of doing lavender - might have to if it's pouring on the day, I suppose :) glad to hear it can work! and yes. MUST remember to savor the moments!

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  5. You bring up some great points! And not only that... but all those trends can get so expensive! I'd rather have some simple and minimal rather than start off my marriage by being in crazy-debt. (Which is why we're just going away to get married...less planning, less stress haha)
    Also, I looooove the sparklers. Friends of mine did that... we all gathered around in a circle and they had their first dance in the middle and the photos they got were incredible!!

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  6. You definitely need to stay true to what reflects YOU and JON! The last thing you want is to look through your own wedding photos in 20 years and think, "Why did we do that?" Haha! Skip what's popular or trendy unless it really is "you"!

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  7. You know how I feel about trends (and I'm so over the mustache craze too...here's to hoping it's left behind in 2012). I do love the idea of fireworks and sparklers to end the night though! Not necessarily as a grand exit, since I'm not always a fan of those either (we literally stayed at the reception until the very, very end). It's more of a way to celebrate, and just have a good time! I say go for it Betsy. Nobody is going to judge you if you use a few trends, especially one like that!

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  8. they can! my photographer told me that when she got married, the only things they spent money on were those they'd use after. (they now have bunting in their house because of it, haha!) it's a great idea.

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  9. YEAH! besides, I'm a total trendsetter, obviously, so whatever we have WILL be cool eventually :P

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  10. I'm hoping that EVERYONE will stay till the end, so our grand exit will be 5 minutes before everyone else's exit! but does that actually ever happen? hm...

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  11. We did sparklers! It didn't totally work because some drunk girl (I think one of my step sisters?) saw that Ben and I had lit some for a few pictures with our photographer, so she yelled for everyone else to light theirs and we ended up ditching our pictures to sprint through them at the last second. It ended up being a lot of fun, but it wasn't totally thought out. ha.

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  12. 1. I can. not. stand. the mustache stuff.
    2. Sparklers are super fun. I think they've only become "trendy" because more and more venues have ruled out more traditional "send offs" such as rice, bird seed, and even bubbles.
    3. I am still drooling over your venue.
    4. I seriously can't remember if we did any kind of exit and I'm too lazy to go look at pictures to remember.
    5. My friend did the big exit... then the limo circled around and we all piled in and went to a bar. Then we all went back to the hotel, changed into comfies, and stayed up late chatting. In this day of no one checking the linens... *ahem*


    and, 6. In Birstwith, the village we lived in our first almost-two years, those floaty lit paper-lantern things were popular, and awfully pretty. Fireworks were frequent as well, but the lanterns always dotted around our little valley after a wedding.

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  13. That infographic was hilarious and so true! I feel like I won't have a dramatic exit at my eventual wedding because I don't want everyone to be thinking about where we're headed, if you know what I mean. :P Plus, I'd probably set something on fire if somebody gave me sparklers or fireworks.

    Thanks for stopping by my blog! I think twinkle lights are magical no matter what season it is. :)
    -Lindsey
    http://ettu-tutu.blogspot.com

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  14. Two things: 1. Love the Hipster chart, I saw it on Refinery 29 weeks ago and thought it was hilarious; and 2. sparklers make for a really fun exit, so if you like the thought of it, then you should go for it, no matter how many times it's been done. Something else that's fun that does not involve a fire hazard is confetti cannons (which is what we did). It is delightful to walk through a storm of confetti, and an added bonus is the pictures look awesome!

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  15. haha it seems that sometimes the most spontaneous things in these oh-so-planned days are the most fun!

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  16. I would have loved to do the lanterns! we do them every summer at the annual carnival in Aldeburgh and release them over the sea. but it's not an option at Bruisyard because there are cows nearby and they're bad for the cows :( apparently the ones with wooden frames are okay though? (that's Jon's contribution to this post!)

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  17. hehe I know what you mean! and yes - we've promised the venue that we'll have a bucket of water handy :)

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  18. it's SO funny. I showed it to Jon and he was like, "do people really DO these things?"


    I like the idea of confetti - though, as Eliza says, you end up picking bits out of crevasses for days!

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  19. Funny {we had sparklers}....... our guests were solidly trashed and had a fabulous time with them. We got a good picture or two out of them and our friends and family told us some stories later on. For example, they lit the sparklers with this giant torch and one of our friends apparently kept yelling "GIVE ME THE GIFT OF LIGHT. GOD GRANT ME THE FLAME OF LOVE." and it was a big, funny hoopla. We ran away in a towncar leaving everyone on the lawn of the vineyard with sparklers. And for this, I am glad we had sparklers. Gave the guests something to do and have fun once we left instead of "okkaaay, now what?" At the same time... yes, we did stop and pose for a cute picture. So, well, I am pro-sparklers.

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  20. HAHAHAHA that is amazing - you have the best friends :)

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  21. I love sparklers!! I wish we could have had them but our reception was at an old wooden building: wasn't happening, haha! (and hey, I'm not a fan of SMP. They denied my wedding when I submitted it. Bitches.)

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  22. (re: SMP - they are missing out! lame.) I'm definitely putting someone sober in charge of the water bucket! we'll be outside... and it'll probably be raining... so we'll be safe :)

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  23. I love love love the idea of sparklers!

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  24. I'm a little late responding (was out of the country for my honeymoon) but if you go with bigger pieces of confetti, there's less chance that those pieces will find ways into your smallest corners :) However, I did end up with a few pieces in my mouth during our exit, which I'm sure was very unflattering...but still fun!

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  25. Somerset Wedding GalOctober 1, 2014 at 8:14 AM

    The sparklers are just beautiful and make for truly atmospheric photographs!

    http://www.holbrookhouse.co.uk/weddings

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