Oh, girl. I hear you.
Jon and I both make every effort to maintain full lives even when we're not together. Because we'll be long distance for so many months, it's crucial that we continue moving forward rather than putting our futures on hold. It also means that, when we do connect, we bring more to the table - we love each other in part for our diverse interests and experiences, and the adventures we have individually contribute to who we are as a couple.
That being said, it's sometimes heartbreaking to enjoy life without Jon. I know I can; it's just that I'd really rather not.
Often, when I freeze in the middle of whatever I'm doing and wish that Jon were with me to share my adventures, I think of The Parting Glass, an old Irish folksong I stumbled on last spring. It's a lovely melody of love and loss and joy and farewell. I recorded it on my laptop last weekend, sitting on the porch in the morning sunlight, a mug of coffee in my hand and Charlie's head on my knee, in a moment of melancholy.
And so I want to close by wishing Jon a very happy anniversary, even from across an ocean. The past four years, with all of their rollercoaster ups and downs and heres and theres, have been blessed. I can't wait until we're together again next month for Thanksgiving - or until the day, sometime after our wedding in August, that we're able to be as man and wife. I love you with all of my heart.
photo credit: Tarah Coonan