Thursday, October 11, 2012

Hey, It's Okay... (Charlie Edition)

The other day, I was walking Charlie around the neighborhood and we ran into an older couple out for a stroll.  Now, my dog is relatively well-behaved, but at 18 months he is still technically a puppy and when he has lots of energy he doesn't have the best self-control.  So when Charlie tried to enthusiastically leap up onto the husband, I pulled him back.  "Charlie," I scolded, "we've talked about jumping!"  The wife laughed.  "You've discussed it with him?"  I just looked at her.  I mean, duh.  Of course we've had conversations about what's appropriate and not, both in public and in private.  What a silly question!  But then it occurred to me that maybe she didn't understand that things are a bit different when you have a dog.

After all:


... to talk to your dog as if he's a toddler.
"Was that a big truck, Charlie? That was a big truck. Wasn't that a big truck!"

... to swear up and down that you're not giving people food to your dog while bribing him with Cheerios.
Cereal doesn't really count as food, per se.

... to have entire conversations about bowel movements.
Asking if a poop was good or bad is completely acceptable when you have a dog who likes to eat everything.

... to decide to run towards a tree just as your dog spots a squirrel on the trunk.
Your need for a burst of cardio has nothing to do with his inevitable lunge forward, obviously.

... to tell your dog that he's given you enough kisses while shoving your face by his snout.
He doesn't listen to you anyway, so he won't be confused by the mixed messages.

... to get territorial when your father calls your dog "my boy" and thinks of him as the son he never had.
You missed your chance, mister; your childbearing years are long over and he's mine.

... to learn to sleep on your side because your dog's taking up too much of your bed for you to sleep flat.
After all, he deserves to be comfortable, too.

... to explain that your dog doesn't go to daycare because of issues with separation anxiety.
You should be fine as long as people don't find out that they're your issues, not his.

I mean, right?  You dog-owners out there understand.  What would you add?

first Hey, It's Okay... post here

13 comments:

  1. Dogs may not understand every word, but they do understand that all that talking adds up to one of their three most important words, LOVE, which is right up there with eat and play!

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  2. well, Charlie definitely understood BREAKFAST, which I hollered across the neighborhood after he got distracted while fetching the paper with Dad :)

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  3. This had me laughing (of course)!! Poo conversations are TOTALLY normal- if Paul or I take out the dogs alone, the first conversation is who pooed, how many times, and if there was any concern in consistency (although with Sloan's IBD it really is a *necessary* conversation, too). Let's see: having complete conversations with your dog and only being mildly embarrassed when you see an entire family of ramblers watching you; fishing questionable items out of slobbery mouths for inspection, even if it's in the middle of a big party at your house; referring to your dogs' friends by name, or at the most by name-breed; calling daycare "school" and hydrotherapy "swimming lessons"... hahahaha!
    Oh, and Cheerios are most definitely NOT "people food"- think about it: they're really only eaten by the under-five people set; so they should be considered "people-in-training food", which Charlie qualifies under!

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  4. Love it! I acquired my husband's bulldog when I moved in a few months ago. I've lived with dogs before, but she's adopted me as her best friend. I read in a book about bulldogs that you have to speak to them in nice tones (like speaking to a toddler obvs) and they actually get offended if you don't let them kiss you. I had to acquiesce, so now I'm one of those wet-faced dog-hugging babytalking dog owners I never thought I'd be.

    She doesn't understand every word, but 'cookie', 'cheese', 'lunch' and 'walk' are among them. We have taken to talking in French around her - "elle mange du fromage?"

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  5. we talk to Charlie in French, too! but usually it's French babble - he seems to like to melody of the language :)

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  6. haha SO TRUE. I'll come home from a walk and tell Mom that we ran into Bailey, you know, the yellow one, just a year old and so friendly, so excited to say hello to Charlie, who lives in the colonial on Woodside. Dad's like, 'Oh, I didn't know they had another baby!" No, Dad. Bailey's a dog.

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  7. I love it! Love it! Love it! This morning we just "discussed" with our dog not to go off with strangers and that's why we keep her on a leash. In my defense, there has been a rash of dog-nappings in the area. Ok, so that's no defense. I talk to her like she's a person all the time!

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  8. Charlie is absolutely my excuse to talk aloud while on walks! no shame.

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  9. Her Late Night CravingsOctober 11, 2012 at 5:24 PM

    We TOTALLY understand!! I had bad sleep for years because I wouldn't move my dogs in the middle of the night because they were taking over my side of the bed. :-) I wouldn't have it any other way!


    Jayme

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  10. All of this is OK by me (and my dog too)

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  11. hehe, i'm a dog owner and lover of my pup named Charlie!! http://ellesees.blogspot.com

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  12. very cute, Betsy!

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  13. ohhh my gosh we are total twins!

    Thanks so much for stoppnig by I am sooo excited to follow along with you!!!
    I am dying at the part about the people "you've discussed it with him"

    I've never ever thought about it sounded weird to non-dog people.


    xo

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