I Know It When I See It

(I want to preface this post with the disclaimer that, while I'm desperate for women to have the legal rights and the social freedom to do whatever they want, I'm not generally a rabid feminist.  I mean, yesterday's post espoused cooking pot pie for your man to make him happy, so I think we can all agree that my stance on sexual equality is, at best, confused.)

You all know, dear readers, that I'm a Democrat; this blog doesn't try to hide my liberal leanings.  Just in case you were still wondering, though, I took a very thorough test to determine where on the social and economic spectrum I might fall in comparison to some contemporary world leaders.  To be honest, I expect to be placed much closer to the center though still in the same quadrant, but apparently I actually overlap almost exactly with the Dalai Lama.  (In order to put myself on the chart I had to cover up his dot to make room for my star - oops.)

I also will admit that I've sort of gone to town in mocking this current crop of Presidential hopefuls from the Republican party.  My intention has been to poke fun gently rather than maliciously and I hope I've been successful because I don't want to insult or alienate anyone.  However, the latest story to come out of the nominating race has offended and outraged me so deeply that I feel compelled to take up my pen.

Herman Cain has been dodging accusations of sexual harassment for the past few weeks from several women who worked for him while he led the National Restaurant Association; he has consistently denied having engaged in any inappropriate behavior and, though his poll numbers have slipped in part as a result of these allegations, he is still one of the leading contenders for the Republican nomination.  The possibility that these stories are true has not dampened his supporters' faith in him.

However, earlier this week a woman named Ginger White claimed to have had an extramarital affair with Cain that lasted for thirteen years.  He denies it, of course, saying that their relationship was purely platonic, but it is this latest scandal that is causing conservatives to question his suitability and is sending his supporters running for the hills:

The allegation is one that could upend his presidential campaign... I think this is the most damaging allegation that has been made to date.  No question about it.
- Former Governor Mike Huckabee

[The latest accusations] created doubt in people's minds whether or not another shoe will drop.
- Fox News host Sean Hannity 

Representative Michele Bachmann of Minnesota said the accusations raised urgent questions about his conservative convictions.
- The New York Times


I cannot grasp an ideology in which allegations of an extramarital affair are more damaging than those of sexual harassment.  I cannot comprehend a belief system in which adultery is worse than assault.   I cannot fathom a code of morality in which it is acceptable to force unwanted attention on a woman but unacceptable to cheat on your wife.  The above assessments from Huckabee, Hannity, and Bachmann might be rooted in a social contract or religious covenant with which I am not familiar, and I do acknowledge that everyone has his/her own opinions and I certainly don't expect us all to always agree.  But I simply cannot understand a philosophy in which the possibility of harassment pales in comparison to the possibility of an extramarital affair.

Beyond my disbelief that these views are not only held but are broadcasted by people in the public eye, I am concerned about the message that this sends to those who are in vulnerable positions and/or are susceptible to sexual harassment - which could be, if we're honest, many of us in one way or another.

A recent ABC/WashPost study revealed that a quarter of American women have experienced sexual harassment in the workplace (compared to 1 in 10 men).  Only 36% of the women polled who had been harassed reported it to their employer; of those who didn't report, 31% said it was because it didn't seem important enough, 14% said it wouldn't do any good, and 18% were concerned about the consequences.  If we send the message that sexual harassment is not a big deal, it will become more prevalent while decreasing further the percentage of victims willing to accuse their harassers.

Look, I get that everyone has a different definition of sexual harassment, but as Justice Potter said of pornography, I know it when I see it.  Often these instances hinge on pre-established relationships and circumstances; many of my colleagues and I banter in a way that could be construed by an outsider as harassment but which is, to us, familiar and even comfortable.  But this should in no way detract from those cases in which women (and men) feel abused or taken advantage of by someone more powerful.  These situations must be taken seriously and followed through appropriately.

We live in a world where, as was discovered in a recent study by the American Association of University Women, 48% of American children in grades 7-12 experienced sexual harassment in the last school year; 56% of girls and 40% percent of boys surveyed said that they had been sexually harassed verbally, physically, or electronically.  Of those who said they had been sexually harassed, 9% reported it to someone in authority at school, 27% talked about it with a family member, and 23% discussed it with a friend, while half did not tell anyone about the harassment at all.  95% of those who identified as harassers had themselves been sexually harassed.

In light of all of these figures, it cannot be emphasized enough that sexual harassment exists and that it is unacceptable.  Leaders in every sphere of influence need to recognize that sexual harassment is a big deal - that it can hugely negatively affect the victims and that allegations must therefore be responded to appropriately.  If we sweep accusations of sexual harassment under the rug, we give our implicit consent for it to continue and even for it to become more casual and common.

I cannot believe that this needs to be enunciated, but if we must say this because it is not already accepted let us do so loud and clear so that even the powerful can hear and and understand that sexual harassment is wrong and that those who are guilty of sexually harassing others must face the consequences of their actions.