I Want Candy

When I was in college, my sister made me a workout mix to inspire me to greater aerobic heights.  The first song on the CD was Aaron Carter's "I Want Candy."  When I hear it - no matter where I am or what I'm doing - my heartrate shoots up and my legs get antsy.  It's crazy.  Also crazy: how this song is totally inappropriate for a tweenager.  I mean, look:

Ew.  Anyway.  Moving on.

I wanted to share some very exciting news with you, dear readers: I've started doing Couch to 5k through the NHS.  Yes, I told you with great fanfare that I was joining a rugby team and then that didn't go anywhere, but this is for real.  I'm on week four of nine, and I feel great when I'm not dying.  This is a huge deal for me - I have never been good at exercise and I have certainly never been a runner, so sticking with the program even this far is a big step.

See, in 2002, I lost 50 pounds; unfortunately, I got down to an unhealthy weight and I didn't manage to do it in an entirely responsible way.  I was able to right myself and maintain a healthy weight (with some slight oscillations) for the next six years, but I started packing on the pounds when I moved to London in September 2008.  I have since regained everything I had lost and then some.  Obviously, I'm not happy about this.

My goal is to get back down to a healthy weight, the weight that my body likes and needs to be in order to function to its fullest potential.  The tricky thing is that I've been terrified that dieting will bring me back to the irresponsible mindset that I had in high school, and so I've been afraid to start eating responsibly and exercising appropriately in case I tip over into an unhealthy mental and physical place.

However, I somehow managed to extract myself from this catch-22 by focusing on overall health rather than weight loss.  (Confession: a stern talking-to from my cardiologist grandfather and a lovingly concerned letter from my Jewish mother helped get the ball rolling.)  Since the new year, I've concentrated on eating more healthily and in smaller portions; I haven't denied myself anything except alcohol, though I have imbibed a bit for special occasions.  Also, I started Couch 2 5k on 26 December and have registered for a 5k race in mid-March as motivation to finish the program on time.  And, in total, I have lost 4.5 pounds since 2 January.

WOOHOO!

Okay.  Sorry.  Just had to get that out of my system.

I promise that this won't turn into a healthy living blog - I hate the word "thinspiration" and I'm automatically turned off by any recipe or food that is called "skinny whatever" and I'm terrible at deprivation of any kind - but I will be sharing my journey with you periodically.  I know that some of you are going through something similar, so I hope you don't mind coming along for the ride with me.  Ideally, we will be able to support each other on this path.

Onwards and upwards!